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Wedding Traditions
More so in
the old days, but even today in some parts of Greece,
the wedding preparations begin when girls are still
toddlers. Mothers start collecting the dowry for their
daughters (sheets, towels, embroideries) and gather all
the necessary items for a household. The dowry often
includes farm land, live stock, and money. In many parts
of Greece, the father of the Bride is responsible for
giving a furnished home to his daughter and son-in-law!
The
following are dates when no wedding ceremony is allowed:
-
January
5-6 (Epiphany)
-
During
Lent and Holy Week
-
During
the Dekapentavgousto (August 1-15)
-
August
29 (The beheading of St. John the Baptist)
-
September 14 (Veneration of the Holy Cross)
-
December
13-25
-
All
holidays of Christ
On the
Island of Kos, a few days before the wedding, two young
girls, or the bride's mother, go door to door to invite
all the guests to the wedding. Before the wedding
(usually Friday or Saturday night), the "nyphostoli"
takes place. This means that all the single girls
decorate the bride's home with all the items from her
dowry (doilies, sheets, blankets, etc.). All relatives
and friends (not the groom), are invited to see how well
prepared the bride is. The guests decorate the wedding
bed with flowers, gold coins and money.
The day of the wedding, women help the bride get ready.
They comb her hair and help her get dressed while
singing wedding songs. At the same time, musicians with
violins and lutes go to the groom's house for the
shaving of the groom and the best man ("koumparo").
After that, the musicians accompany the groom and his
relatives on their walk to the church and then head for
the bride's home to accompany her and her relatives to
the church.
During the wedding ceremony, the "koumbaro" and/or "koumbara"
take the wedding bands from the bridal couple's fingers
and cross them over each other 3 times, then place them
back on their fingers. They do the same with the crowns
("stephana"), and place them back on the couple's heads.
The guests stand around the bridal couple and during the
Isaiah dance, they throw rice and almond candy ("koufeta")
at the bride and groom while hitting the koumbaro/koumbara
on the back yelling "Axios" (or "Axia"), which
translates to "worthy".
The wedding crowns ("stephana") symbolize royal crowns
to denote that the bride will become the queen and the
groom will become the king of the household. After the
wedding, the bride and groom take off the crowns and
place them in the "stephanothiki". The stephanothiki is
usually hung above the couple's bed or near the
Iconostasis. Before the "stephana" are placed on the
couple's heads by the priest, they remain in a tray
filled with almond candies ("koufeta"). It is
traditional for single girls to take the candy from the
tray and place it under their pillow for three nights.
The belief is that on the third night they will dream of
their future husband. Another tradition is for the bride
to write in pencil on the bottom of her shoe, the names
of single girls . The girl who's name erases first, will
be the next one in line to get married.
When the chanter reads the Apostle reading, there is a
section that says "The woman shall fear the man". At
that point, the groom lightly steps on the bride's
foot(to gain the upper hand in the marriage), but
sometimes the woman beats him to it and steps on his
foot instead. At that point of the service, the guests
divert their attention to the couple's feet to see who
will step on the other first!
The priest gives red wine to the bride and groom to
drink from the same cup. Any leftover wine is given to
the koumbara/koumbaro to drink after the ceremony is
over.
After the ceremony, the parents of the bride step
forward to kiss the stephana and then the bride and
groom. The bridal couple then, stands by the Narthax
where all the guests wish them "Na zisete" (life to
you). Immediately after the wedding ceremony, all the
guests take a favor ("boumbouniera") which is almond
candy rapped in tulle. The number of almond candy
included in the boumbouniera must be an odd number,
usually three or five. In the USA, the favors are given
to the guests after the wedding reception. After the
church, all the guests go to the wedding reception where
musicians play the violins and lutes and everyone dances
the traditional Greek dances. The first dance is lead by
the bride. The first song is usually "Orea poun i nifi
mas ki orea to prikia tis" ("our bride is so beautiful
and so is her dowry"). While the bride is dancing, and
throughout the wedding reception, guests pin money or
jewelry on her gown.
After the reception, the newlyweds leave for their
honeymoon. The location of the honeymoon used to be a
secret. No one was allowed to know where the groom was
taking the bride. During the first year of marriage, the
bride is not allowed to get upset, to go to a funeral or
to eat "kolliva".
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